It should be simple, shouldn't it? We think so, but sometimes sorting out the guest list can be one of the biggest dramas of planning the entire wedding! Yes, we are serious. If this article doesn't ring true to you then lucky you. We are going to talk you through a couple of key areas where guests lists can catch you out.
"You can't invite Eric without inviting Lucy"
"Nan will never sit next to your aunt you know"
"I'm not going if they are going"
If these sound familiar then this is the right article for you.
Family politics can be an unfortunate part of planning a wedding. We see this with many of our clients and they aren't alone. It's easy for family members to feel that they are calling the shots on planning your guest list and quickly forget that it's your day and it should all be about you.
If you think this is likely to happen to you then it is always worth having a think upfront who might cause the harmony of the planning process to go off the rails. Make yourself a list of any conflicts you might get and how you can work around them (such as keeping people apart with the seating plans). We also see big benefits in talking to others about your concerns and trying to talk to individuals before to remind them it's your day.
Don't be afraid to make hard decisions if it's made for the right reason. Not every situation can be resolved unfortunately so there may be some tricky conversations to have where you change who you invite if people can get along for the sake of your day. You may need to ask yourself some difficult questions like "if they can't get along for the sake of my day then do I want them to come".
We hope that talking with others and getting support from other friends and family can help you find a middle ground. Most people do and most see the bigger picture that it's your wedding. Let us know if you need any further advice though, we are here to help.
Keeping up with changes
Keep a guest list somewhere handy, like on your phone.
Changes can happen at any time, it could be a phone call from someone, a text or WhatsApp and to make sure you don't forget later it's always best you update your list straight away or at least make a note of it. With changing numbers it will also have a knock-on effect to things like any seating plans you have prepared. We would recommend not changing your seating plan every time your guest list changes. Update at regular intervals only and then finalise much closer to the big day. This will save you a lot of rework on the plans.